Ability to sell and influence others
We already know that to empower means “to give power to” and our mission is to equip everyone with the confidence to live successful lives.
Our kids will enter the most competitive job market that the world has ever seen. Due to rapid globalization, American graduates now compete alongside many more of their peers from around the globe. It is imperative, therefore that kids develop the self-esteem to stand out and to sell themselves.
“Your most important sale in life is to sell
yourself to yourself. “
Self-Esteem and Influence
Influence: the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone.
How can you have an effect on someone when you don’t believe in yourself. Isn’t that the first rule in sales? You have to believe in the product that you’re selling.
I was teaching a group of twenty 6-11 year olds. I asked, "Who's smart?" Only a couple children fully raised their hands, some half heartedly, and most, for whatever reason, chose to keep their hands down.
This bothers me. These are smart and capable kids who, at some point in their short lives and how did they begin to doubt their intelligence? I sense that most people are not intentional or malicious, but what influences cause this? Is it peer pressure, unknowing teachers, some social phenomenon?
It reminds me of a study in which researchers asked children if they were artists. They asked those of Kindergarten-age and then older kids in 5th grade. It was alarming that just about all of the 5-6 year olds thought of themselves as artists; whereas, only a couple 5th graders raised their hands.
This is kind of young for kids to be placing self-limiting limitations on the scope of their lives.
Life doesn't end at high school either, but young adults are for some reason looked down upon if they don't have their entire LIFE PLAN figured out.
People can choose to be who or what they want. However, if it is at 2nd grade that a student determines that they "just aren't good at math", then that child will likely NEVER become an engineer.
There certainly is potential within EVERYONE to be something GREAT!
Development of Confidence
Do you know why we yell? In chapter three, you learned about going from a relaxed state prior and during the execution of a technique ending in a state of tension at the moment of impact with the target. At this moment of contact, a yell allows the core to tighten.
The yell is also one of the most empowering practices that we do. A yell can call attention to an attacker getting yourself some help. A yell/stern voice can convince someone to stand down avoiding an attack altogether. Your yell becomes a tool and can be cathartic releasing stress from the body.
The act of hitting a target like a heavy bag can release stress, but when combined with a yell, it is most effective. When you need to get something off of your mind, or let something out, yelling is a perfect way to do it, and people won’t think twice or be as nervous about yelling in Karate class where it’s expected.
Very few kids use eye contact by default. This is something that must be trained and modeled by the adults. How many times is your child speaking to you, and you’re looking at your phone or laptop instead of them?
According to Psychology Today, it’s the
“strongest form of nonverbal communication.”
Perhaps, your child even pleads for you to just look at them. Kids learn quickly that Looking someone in the eye expresses empathy, concern, and that THIS person matters.
A study by Quantified Impressions,
a Texas-based communications analytics company, found that, “An adult makes eye contact
between 30-60% of the time. In order to make an emotional connection however, it requires
60-70% eye contact during a conversation.”
It is not by chance that we call it eye “contact” because this is how we connect with others, and we are in a crisis that only the adults in the room can resolve.
Parents will enroll their children in our programs to build their confidence, and a large a large part of expressing confidence is in using eye contact.
When students enter our Dojangs (Korean name for Dojos), instructors will say hello using eye contact, and they are expected to reply. Experiment and observe the use of eye contact in your community. Do you witness an eye-contact crisis.